House Hunters: Disney Castle Edition

--Lilly and Kyle are first time home buyers embarking on a house hunting adventure! Kyle sells pens to circuit court law clerks and Lindsey works from home. They have not yet found a bank that is willing to loan them money for a mortgage. Their real estate agent took them to Cinderella’s Castle in Walt Disney World and here’s what Lilly had to say:--

-       It’s a walking community and I love the idea of walking everywhere. I’ll walk to the Main Street Arcade Starbucks for my morning latte… flavored cake pop. So, also, I’m gluten free, so I have to be careful about which kind of park snacks I eat. Are churros gluten free? Whatever- I’m getting corndog nuggets at Casey’s Corner!

-       So, I’m really into juicing- so naturally, I love that this castle is just a wishing well coin’s throw from the Dole Whip stand in Adventureland. Kyle and I could walk there after dinner. Or, Kyle could just pick up a to-go order for me on his way in from work.

-       There are only 7 castles like this in existence which is definitely a selling point for us because I like exclusive things. One is in Germany where Hansel and Gretel are from, but is like super old and dated… so that’s a no go. This Orlando castle makes more sense from a resale standpoint.

-       I believe in the law of attraction and this seems like fate because my dad has always called me his princess. Also, I wore a crown for my 21st birthday party.

-       I’m gluten free, so living space square footage is very important to me. I love entertaining and can’t wait to have all of my friends over to Be Our Guests.

-       So, I consider myself a minimalist. All of the Disney themed dad hats that I own just have one small symbol on them. Americans have too many things.

-       This castle will show so well on social media.

-       I NEED THIS WALK IN CLOSET!!! I can keep all of my Disney Dad Hats in this drawer right here. Andddd I guesssss Kyle can have this little corner for all of his clothes… right babe? [Kyle is watching TV and does not answer]

-       We can’t afford this.

-       This move would increase Kyle’s commute time. He will now have to take a steam train, boat, monorail, and bus just to reach his car. Also, he works in Georgia.

-       Space Mountain blocks our master bedroom lagoon view. 

-       From what I understand, this castle has a sordid tale (as old as time) backstory of evil and deception. I don’t like places that hold negative energy. I'd have to get so many more crystals to cleanse this space.

-       This castle has an exhibitionist mouse problem. The mice in this house only wear shirts. 

-       This castle was built in 1971 and I don’t like 70s architecture. We’re also looking at a similar castle in Anaheim built in 1955- love love love midcentury bungalows!

-      This castle is NOT move in ready-- Lots of updates are needed. I really like open concept designs and ideally would like to remove every single interior wall from the home. I’d also like to incorporate granite, pink and black, like the entrance of EPCOT in every room. Rumor has it that EPCOT is removing the sparkly pink Leave a Legacy exhibit in the next few years and I really like look and price of salvaged pieces.

-       I’m running out of things to list but like having opinions.